Aug. 12, 2002 - 15:58 MDT

THE WONDERING JEW

No Fledglings

Having a family in sections, four and then a caboose baby to cap it off is an experience that is amazing above all things I think. Our Fab Four were 12, 14, 15 and 19 years old when Number Five made her appearance. I was 42 years old, Heather a tired 38. It wasn't too long after her birth that Heather went back to work. A night shift job at Motor Vehicle and I was working days. Oldest one was working at a Pizza Parlor a good part of that time except when he got a summer job at the refinery. Then was when our car's engine never relaxed enough to cool down. Real complicated scheduling so that everyone had a ride when it was needed.

But the little one had four adoring siblings who took care of her when they had the chance. I think she thrived under the care, love and attention that was lavished on her. Outgoing and generous to a fault from the beginning. She was quite good in school, had many friends and was happy.

Time as is its habit flew by. One by one the other four grew up, got married and moved away. Heather and I pretty well handled things with equanimity on those four, proud and happily even so. Watched them get settled and begin having children.

Our daughter, the last of our progeny at home finished high school and moved on. She went to a university about 30 miles away and lived on campus. But there were many visits back and forth. Heather and I would occasionally talk about when daughter would find the right man for her and get married. In our minds it was somewhere in the future, dimly sensed.

But things don't always work on our projected time schedule nor do they happen in the sequence we expect. She had been dating through high school but nothing serious occurred. In her second year at the University we were introduced to her boyfriend up there. Not many words were said but Heather and I felt that this man would be her husband, sometime in the future.

Then the future hit us broadside, she and her swain married and moved to Santa Barbara where her husband went to do his PhD. She finished her education by gettting a Masters degree. She decided one PhD in a family was enough so found work in Santa Barbara in the interim and again when they moved to Oregon.

So Heather and I were living in this big empty house that had once been full to overflowing with daughter and her friends. The nest was empty but we would spend time with our visiting Denver kids and pleasantly passed the time. But the echo was still there, the laughter and chatter of the girls, their little parties at our house crept out of the corners now and then.

The hands of our clock moved on, we both retired and were able to vist daughter and her husband in Santa Barbara (I was still working then but did manage a weekend now and then) and then in Oregon. Heather was up there a time or two while I was still working but when I retired we were able to drive up there to see them at least twice a year.

All the years our first four were coming up it was a mad scramble to survive and by the time they married and began to have children I was working two jobs most of the time so I didn't get the time to be around our grandchildren as much as I wanted to be. It rankled but that was life.

When our Oregon daughter bore a son about five years after she got married Heather was there and not too long after his birth I was there too and fulfilled the task she had set me when I walked her down the aisle at her wedding. I said to her quietly, "Well, now my job is done today." She looked up at me and said, "No Daddy it isn't, not until you hold my baby in your arms."

Three and a half years later their daughter made the scene and we both were there. I have had the opportunity to be with these two grandchildren for extended times as they grow much as I yearned to do when our other grandchildren were growing up.

In a very few years I was able to return to childhood with grand son, playing with Legos, toy cars, down on the floor on my knees, immersed in fun and once in a while noticing the grown folks going their mysterious ways. As he has grown our play has got past the model building stage, now and then I can help him learn a few things about the use of tools when he has a project going. It is now at the stage that all of us can sit at the table and play fun games at the table, fun for all of us. Yet still I can see things through his eyes and once again have the feelings of childhood as it goes on. Heather and our grand daughter have their tea parties, play dolls and all that girly stuff.

Some years ago we moved from that castle that had so many memories of family fun to a comfy apartment. We manage to visit with our children, grand children and dandle great grand children frequently here in Denver and fly back to visit our youngest progeny and her family in Oregon.

Its time to move when the nest has no eggs and No Fledglings . . . . . . . . . . .

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