2001-07-08 - 09:23 MDT

THE WONDERING JEW

Other Side Of The Coin

This year has been very crowded for me. Seems like there are important family occasions, one right after the other. Friday, the funeral of a loved one. Saturday the marriage of our young niece, barely in her majority. A joyful thing, not an expensive one but one which filled the church on both sides of the aisle. The temperature yesterday afternoon was ninety degrees, somewhat milder than the previous days, but which strained the air conditioning in the church to the utmost. Her love is Hispanic and our family Anglo, something that could not have happened when I was a young kid.

He had been courting her for about three years. He is a courteous, kind, lively person. His family is a vibrant, lovely group attached to each other.

The reception filled the small hall. No attempt at cooling was made except for wide open doors and windows.

Each side of the aisle," filled the hall. There was not much activity for a while each side visting with their own.

Then there was food, food, food awaiting the arrival of the wedding couple. On their arrival amidst cheers and hand claps they went by the serving table and then sat down with their wedding party at the head table. The line of people at the table was mixed and much conversation went on in the line between people.

After a time the DJ started the dance music changing from the more or less background music he had been playing while we ate. The bridal couple danced their solo dance, they were so wonderfully dignified and apparently oblivious to every thing extraneous to them. There was a sweet kiss between them as they danced. After that was over the first ones on the floor were the little kids whose restlessness had totally overflowed and s'elp me I never saw such a bunch. They had been so "on good behavior" all through ritual behavior and then blessed relief, letting them blow off all that excess energy which had been building up for two hours.

Then the action became general, there was line dancing with all taking part. It was as if they had been practicing with each other for a spell. Beautiful it was with all of the teeners and those in their twenties a part of it. Then the dancing became general, more or less every one danced with everyone else. Some daddies and uncles were carrying a tot in their arms as they danced, everybody smiling and happy.

One beautiful thing to me was that there was no alcohol served or nipped at outside the hall, unusual for a wedding this day and age.

For me it was a wedding to be remembered forever. So many different families, all related to each other. The ones that weren't related were so, after the wedding. Such gentility and sociability I have never seen before. At the front of the building in what would be called a porch on a house, those who were overheated in the hall would gather and be cooled off by a slight breeze. I enjoyed conversing with "whoever," teasing the little kids and talking to those interested in conversation. Some just stood out there enjoying the breeze, but most of us conversed. Out there the noise from inside was muted and hearing what someone said was possible.

The chicken dance took up the whole hall, young, old and those in between had a hilarious time performing those ridiculous motions.

After while there was a pause in the dancing and the bride threw her bouquet which was caught by a thrilled girl who was all of thirteen years old. And then more dancing and visiting outside.

Later the bride and groom cut the cake and gave each other a bite, no gooshy smears on this occasion as happens at other weddings, just a dignified exchange between them.

Shortly after that many of us older folks began to leave, Heather and I amongst them. For us the occasion was a bitter sweet thing for the families of us who had attended the funeral of our loved one the day before. Heather and I were not euphoric, which is my usual demeanor at weddings, but we did welcome seeing the Other Side Of The Coin . . . . . . .

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