2001-05-20 - 17:02 MDT

THE WONDERING JEW

Heartfelt Thought

I have seen bwg's comment and the comment of the person who did the writing. I took the time to think before sitting down at the keyboard to say my piece.

Coming home after taking oldest daughter from her assisted living home to her favorite "treat" place, MacDonalds I sat down and checked to see what was new on the web - - - - I sat and thought deeply about Kaycee.

Number One - - - I am not hurt nor enraged for believing in some angelic being. I did learn and learn a lot -- for that I will always be thankful.

As I see it as of now there are three angels in Heaven who tried their best to be all they could be. Also, two angels still on this earth trying to do good too.

I do think that what was bruited about the last day or two was a deliberately cruel and sadistic action. If it had been my suspicion - - - - I would have said NOTHING ----- NOTHING until I had definite proof of my suspicion being the true state of things.

To my way of thinking --- in my opinion --- that was a rotten thing to do, it reminds me of the shit passed back and forth over the back fences by the gossips that I as a kid -- not supposed to know a damn thing, heard, understood and often saw that it was twisted suspicion and often later unfounded. What used to bother me so much was that innocent people were hurt needlessly. And that the gossips mouths were watering as they propagated their propaganda. At times there was truth woven in but was totally obscured by the vicious turn of mind of said gossips.

So, am I angry, hurt, disillusioned and cynical about this ? ? Why should I be ? ? I have been around people who were suffering terminal illness and saw the great fortitude, faith and suffering they underwent -- striving to be cheerful even so - - until their candle flame went out. In this Kaycee episode a way of life has been laid out for me, a certain way to think and feel. Debbie or whoever wrote all this did a very remarkable thing in bringing to us just how it should be and how a person should be of as good cheer as possible. The poetry to my mind was well done and moving.

Back in a corner of me - - - Kaycee lives, whether three people or just one - - - the spirit is there and will forever be for me.

This is my Heartfelt Thought . . . . . .

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