Sept. 17, 2006 - 19:18 MDT

FITTING WORDS

This is a lady that many dislike, many love and many feel that she skews the truth. Regardless of that, I think she has max street smarts and a great deal of horse sense. So her column in our Sunday paper I think is quite apropos.

To my mind, who better than her to write a tribute to Ann Richards ? One of Creator's Syndicate of course -- one who knows the ground. Here is Molly Ivins tribute to Ann Richards quoted in full:

ANN RICHARDS GENEROUS, EFFECTIVE

She was so generous with her responses to other people. If you told Ann Richards something really funny, whe wouldn't just smile of laugh, she would stop and break up completely. She taught us all so much -- she was a grat campfire cook. Her wit was a constant delight. One night on the river on a canoe trip, while we all listened to the next rapid, which sounded like certain death, Ann drawled, "It sounds like every whore in El Paso just flushed her john."

"She knew how to deal with teenage egos: Instead of pointing out to a kid who was pouring charcoal lighter on a live fire that he was idiot, Ann said, "Honey if you keep doing that, the fire is going to climb right back up to that can in your hand and explode and give you horrible injuries, and it will just ruin my entire weekend."

"At a long ago political do at Scholz Garten in Austin, everybody who was anybody was there meetin' and greetin' at a furious pace. A group of us got the tired feet and went to lean our butts against a table at the back wall of the bar. Perched like birds in a row were Bob Bullock, then state comptroller, moi, Charles Miles, the head of Bullock's personnel department, and Mrs. Ann Richards. Bullock 20 years in Texas politics, knew every sorry, no-good so-and-so in the entire state. Some old racist judge from East Texas came up to him, "Bob, my boy, how are you ? Bullock said, "Judge, I'd like you to meet my friends. This is Molly Ivins with the Texas Observer" The judge peered up at me and said, "How yew, little lady ?" Bullock continued, "And this is Charles Miles, the head of my personnel department." Miles who is black, stuck out his hand, and the judge got an expression on his face as though he had just stepped into a fresh cowpie. He reached out and touched Charlie's palm with one finger, while turning eagerly to the pretty, blonde blue-eyed Richards. "And who is this lovely lady ?" Ann beamed and replied, "I am Mrs. Miles."

When she was elected governor in 1990, Ann got handed a stinking mess. Nearly every state function was under court order. The prisions were so crowded, dangerous convicts were being let loose. She had a long grinding four years and wound up fixing all of it. She always said you could get a lot done in politics if you didn't need to take credit."

"The 94 election was a God-gays-and-guns deal. Annie had told the legislature that if they passed a right-to-carry law, she would veto it. They did, and she did. At the last minute, the NRA launched a big campaign to convince the governor that we Texas women would feel ever so much safer if we could just carry guns in our purses."

"Said Annie, "Well you know that I am not a sexist, but there is not a woman in this state who could find a gun in her handbag."

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I would like to have known Ann Richards, and as far as that goes, I would have liked to have worked for her too. I am sure that so much of what she said would have kept me in stitches while I watched smart-asses bleed a bit around the foot in their mouth.

From a very savvy Texas lady, I think she wrote some FITTING WORDS . . . . . . . . .

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