2000-02-04 - 00:36:11

SANDY AREA AHEAD

imprisoned inside my skull beside me are two incorporeal entities.....twins - but not related. imagine pictures you have seen of a person with a small devil perched at the ear on one shoulder and a small angel perched at the ear on the other side. i named one Encourager and the other Discourager.

ol Dis is the loudest, muffling sound from Enc. Dis has a mentor so to speak, Sir Apathy, wow, what an anchor dragging team. Enc has his team The Bright Siders. i like Enc and his group much better, there is a feeling of home and security about them. they are calm, not pushy and gentle.

when Dis is jumping up and down, bouncing off the bony sides of my skull, screaming to high heaven and trying to push me into the arms of Sir Apathy, it is pretty hard for Enc to get a word in edgewise. worse yet, Enc looks at the world through my good left eye and Dis looks out of the bad right eye, the one his acid has warped.

in times of my distress, it seems as if my left eye is controlled by Enc moving in it's orbit at a placid pace. my right eye with Dis in control is spinning like a basketball on the tip of a harlem globetrotters finger.

if it were truly so, the opthomologist would be peering in my eyes with his chin hugging instrument of torturing light. the two entities disturb my peace and destroy my sleep. one thing i can do to help the situation become sane is to read a book which is engrossing and places the mind into its pages and gives Enc a bit more self esteem. leading him into putting his shoulder to my figurative wheel. another method is to get into deep and meaningful conversation with a peer who has common sense (a rarity these days) grandpa called it, "horse sense." also being in debate, not argument puts the quietus on ol' Dis for a spell. over the years i have been lucky in giving Dis enough discomfort that he does leave me alone long enough for me to get something done, with the help of blessed Enc. then i am proud of us.

what ever the above is called, it illustrates my struggle through life. thankfully i have retained a sense of humor and indulge in a belly laugh and a chuckle or two.

Blog