Jun. 25, 2005 - 15:06 MDT

DON'T IT ?

Life for me is much like a deaf, blind man trying to find his way around a supermarket on a busy day and actually get done what he wishes to do.

Normally Heather is the first one up, makes the coffee and gets started on her day. So, I do try to be up by at least eight to get the coffee on and bring the paper in so that she can read the news. I get her cereal and milk in a bowl along with a cup of coffee.

Trying to fit myself into her needs and desires is something I try to handle with panache, but often find that, one way or another, I have managed to boo-boo and hurt her feelings a bit. She is very forgiving and acknowledges my apologies rather than being snarky about it.

Sometimes it is a bit confusing too. This morning I said that it looked like a nice day and did she want to go today to Palumbo's vegetable stand up north of town. She had been talking about seeing what they had and hoping for ripe tomatoes as they have the very nicest. She readily agreed, I got myself ready and then helped her.

Getting her ready to go is as ego destructive to her as it was when she had to dress me after I came home in a halo. Gingerly removing her sling and helping her wash up, etc. and finally getting her clothes on rather than a nightgown and robe is a job in calesthenics for me -- trying to do right without hurting her shoulder. But, we got it done without frayed tempers or hurt bodies.

All along the way through our life I have tried to be responsive and receptive to her ideas. Doubly reminding myself that this is the time do be extremely so. So, I lay back and take a change of mood or plans with as much equanimity as an old man can muster. Today I mustered the forces.

Heather sat back down in her chair and thoughtfully said, "I think it is too early to go that far away from home, maybe we shouldn't go today." Oof, this is my "free spirit" speaking to me. The lady who goes stir-crazy with cabin fever if she is house bound two days in a row.

So, we talked about it, me asking if she was depressed or had some other quirk about getting out from home. Turns out that she really doesn't want to go far from town until after she sees her surgeon on her post op check-up. Putting myself in her shoes (big feet don't fit well, but - - - )I can see her point.

So we trickled out of the house, went to the post office to check the box, go to Lone Star for lunch, back by Safeway to get bananas and on home to a house where I had started the swamp cooler on low before we left.

Heather got comfortable in her chair and napped a bit and is now watching TV, and I at the keyboard. For right now this is our life, and after she sees her surgeon and gets a go ahead and approval then we will go up to Palumbo's and another day go to Greeley to see our daughter. By then Heather will be more than ready.

But for right now life gets sorta daily, DON'T IT ? . . . . . . . .

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