Dec. 02, 2002 - 19:55 MST

THE WONDERING JEW

City Kid

I grew up in what was once called a Cow Town, guess maybe because Swift and Company, Cudahy and other packing houses were here and the adjacent stockyards were huge. Some still call it a Cow Town, some of the larger cities I have been in though maybe could be called big crowded messes. Our town is getting that way. It is not Denver and vicinity as they used to say in the weather forecast, nor Denver and suburbs, now a fairly fancy name to umbrella it in one place, Denver Metro Area. But still there are the suburbs with their own mayors etc. We always lived more or less on the edge of town, in one direction from where we happened to live was fields and bare ground. Yet a streetcar could take us to town in a half hour. Growth and sprawl has come West.

As a kid though I was aware of knowing that people were close by. In stores, on the streets, school and in the houses of our neighbors. Maybe it was herd instinct, need, whatever, it was there for me. Even when I was delivering papers way before dawn I had that secure feeling knowing those dark houses held people at rest. I guess it was not noticed by me when it was there, maybe surrounding me like a comforter on a cold winter's night.

A time or two it seemed that I was the only person in the state. Once I got separated from my cousins on a picnic in the mountains. Walking along and enjoying being in that environment but suddenly a horrible hollow feeling hit the pit of my stomach -- realizing I was alone -- all alone, in my mind seemingly the only person left in the world. To this day I don't know if they snuck off from me or not staying close to the group was what happened. But the aloneness overwhelmed me. I was lost, didn't know which way was what.

Almost like a dog following a scent of a scurrying animal I wandered to and fro trying to decide which way to go to the picnic grounds. I caught a glimpse of an animal of some size, startled, the animal thundered off away from me and I the other way. Nevertheless I was really spooked.

This was before I had any scouting lore. As my traipse pattern wound its way through trees and undergrowth it became more frightening as we had started hiking in late afternoon and even though it was summer it was worrisome the knowledge the sun would set and it would get dark.

Panic stricken I began to run as fast as possible and remembering that we hiked uphill from the picnic I ran downhill hoping to at least find the road or any road. Of course running downhill, occasionally making a misstep or tripping on a rock my body would become as a rolling rock, tumbling, bouncing from one spot to another. Finally there was a road under my feet. Then, which way to go ? The panic that our party would go looking for me in the wrong direction and give up and return to town (I now know of course they wouldn't have done that) but in extreme youth and inexperienced panic the brain in my head was disengaged.

Remembering that we had gone uphill on the hike and the road I was on had a downward trend that is the way I went, downhill. What seemed like hours, but probably was just a few minutes my picnic folks came in sight.

A complete Jeckyll and Hyde change overcame me and I swaggered into our area and asked, "Where did you all go ? How come you came back so early ? I was having lots of fun." I bragged a bit about the (?) bear (?) that ran from me up there. Really laid it on. The thought occurs now that the tear tracks down my dusty cheeks gave me away to the adults and maybe to my cousins also. But my status as an adventurer, sufficient unto myself was in danger and I didn't want anyone to think of me as just a City Kid . . . . . . .

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